<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>The Day by limjaeseven</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29212965">The Day</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/limjaeseven/pseuds/limjaeseven'>limjaeseven</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Verse 2 [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>GOT7, JJ Project</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Album: Verse 2, Funeral, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Sad Park Jinyoung (GOT7), eulogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:34:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,219</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29212965</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/limjaeseven/pseuds/limjaeseven</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaebeom is gone and Jinyoung is broken. But there's one last thing that the elder left for his best friend.</p>
<p>Verse 2: Part 7 of 8</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Verse 2 [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2132364</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Day</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>We're almost done with this series! It's rather bittersweet that there's only one part left but I really hope you like it.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jinyoung’s memories of his last few days were hazy at best. He only felt the reality of the situation sink in as he was on an airplane, flying home. He didn’t remember leaving the hospital, the only thing that was on his mind was the news report. Even though he didn’t understand a word of it, the picture of Jaebeom, face down on the road plagued him.</p>
<p>Jaebeom was gone. Jinyoung wished he could wake up from the horrible nightmare he was living through but regardless of how many times he pinched himself, Jaebeom was still not in the room next to his. He tried to tell himself it was just Jaebeom ignoring him again, but the sound of the elder’s mother crying was enough to tell him that it was real.</p>
<p>Jaebeom was dead. The funeral was held three days after he passed away, in a small cemetery close to their house. Jinyoung thought of the day they had come to bury Jaebeom’s cat in that very same place. Jaebeom had been devastated through it, Jinyoung sat there by him, letting him cry on his shoulder for hours as the evening turned to night.</p>
<p>Jinyoung had to physically drag Jaebeom home because the elder refused to leave. He was 21 at the time, still high off the success of Icarus. Jaebeom had loved her a lot and letting her go was one of the hardest things he had to ever do. Or so Jinyoung thought, blissfully ignorant of the sword of Damocles hanging over his head. </p>
<p>Jaebeom’s mother had been able to get him a spot right next to his cat, where the two had often joked they would lay to rest together when they were to die. There was still a spot empty next to Jaebeom but Jinyoung tried not to think about it. He was supposed to give Jaebeom’s eulogy but all he could do was cry. Jinyoung was never one to cry but seeing Jaebeom like that, knowing that it would be the last time he would ever see him, it burst the dam inside Jinyoung.</p>
<p>As he was beating himself up for not being able to say one word about Jaebeom to the people crowding around him despite the fact that he was Jaebeom’s best friend, a pat on his back pulled him out of his head. He turned around to see Seulgi standing there, a sombre smile on her face.</p>
<p>“He promised me to never tell you. I was the one who blocked your number, I was the reason you weren't able to get to Jaebeom. I hope you don’t hold it against him, he just wanted you to be happy, Jinyoung'' Despite Seulgi’s attempts to calm him down, her words just multiplied the guilt in his heart. Of course Jaebeom would never ignore him just like that, how could he have been such a fool? How could he have hurt Jaebeom so bad? Coward, Jinyoung thought as he looked at Jaebeom’s father trying to console his mother. He didn’t even have the courage to say a word about Jaebeom, a man that meant so much to him.</p>
<p>Jinyoung took deep breaths as he felt himself sink into his mind, it had been happening a lot since Jaebeom left. Jinyoung found recluse in a part of his mind aloof from the real world, he spent hours there, not thinking, not feeling. He didn’t know what else to do. Thinking about the days he cried about his hyung not being in the other room felt like a lifetime ago, because he knew Jaebeom was never coming back. </p>
<p>The memories of Jaebeom rushed to his mind, from the day they had first met to their time in school together, random moments from high school, scenes from Icarus and it was just too much. Just as they were about to leave, Jinyoung cleared his throat, looked at the ground where Jaebeom was resting and wiped his tears with the back of his hand.</p>
<p>“I met Lim Jaebeom when I was five,” Everyone looked up in shock at Jinyoung but the younger continued, just thinking of the elder, “He was the most grumpy, lazy, good for nothing, kind, caring, and talented people I had ever met in my life. We had our ups and downs, sure; there was a time we both thought our friendship was done, sure; but not once did he ever not be the rock in my life, the only person that kept me going when things were hard. He never told me about his illness because he knew it would hurt me. That was the man Jaebeom hyung was. He was selfless to a fault, and he took my rage because of it. There are a million things I want to apologise to you for, hyung, and a hundred times as many things for which I want to thank you. I couldn’t possibly ever truly be able to express everything that you were to me, but I can say this much; thank you for always being there for me, even when I was horrible to you. Thank you for loving me when I hated myself. Thank you for coming into my life and showing me a world that I never knew existed. Thank you for being you. I’m sorry I was never good enough, but I will try to live on, just for you, because that’s what you would have wanted. I love you, hyung, and I always will. Look after me from up in the sky if you can.”</p>
<p>Jinyoung hugged Jaebeom’s mother tightly as he helped her into the car, waving her and Jaebeom’s father off as they drove away. Jinyoung didn’t want to go back home, it reminded him too much of Jaebeom but he didn’t have much of a choice. He wanted to return Jaebeom’s possessions to his parents so he had to pack everything as soon as he could.</p>
<p>But that didn’t end well, because less than five minutes in, Jinyoung was curled up on the floor with Jaebeom’s leather duffle bag clutched against his chest, tears streaming down his face. The item still smelled like him, Jinyoung thought, picturing Jaebeom with the bag slung over his shoulder as they boarded the plane to Hokkaido.</p>
<p>It was too difficult to even be in a five meter radius of the room, let alone going through Jaebeom’s things. Just being in the same space that the elder was in not days before made Jinyoung’s eyes well with tears. He couldn’t do it, he couldn’t part with the things that showed that Jaebeom was a part of his life for so many years. Even though he would always be in Jinyoung’s heart, he had already seen what the room looks like when empty and he hated the mere thought of it.</p>
<p>It took a while for him to muster up enough courage to tell Jaebeom’s mom that he wouldn’t be able to return his things, but she immediately shut him down, telling him that she wanted him to have Jaebeom’s things. She knew how much they meant to Jinyoung and wanted him to keep them for as long as he wanted them.</p>
<p>Jinyoung took two weeks off work to put himself back together and spent the entirety of it in Jaebeom’s room. The place had become a sort of safe haven for Jinyoung, reminding him of Jaebeom enough for him to still imagine that the man was alive. He cleared up the mess in his room, folded and arranged all his clothes, dusted his shelves of records. </p>
<p>Just as Jinyoung was finishing up with Jaebeom’s closet, he noticed a box at the back of the shelf. Pulling it out, he realised it was the box for Jaebeom’s watch, and the tears were in his eyes before he could even process what he was doing. Placing the elder’s watch which Jaebeom’s mother had given to Jinyoung at the funeral in the box, he closed it shut and shoved into a corner, not wanting to look at it ever again. His own watch had mysteriously started counting the same second over and over again, the time same as that of Jaebeom’s death and burial; 1:31:23.</p>
<p>Looking through Jaebeom’s desk was probably the hardest task of all. The drawers were full of photos of the two of them at various points in their friendship, from the photo Jinyoung took of Jaebeom with his father’s camera when they were five to selfies they took with a disposable camera in Paris while Jinyoung was shooting a movie. Memories that Jinyoung knew he would never get to relive ever again. Jinyoung cried more than he probably had in his entire life in those two weeks. </p>
<p>Jaebeom’s computer was just as bad, full of more videos and photos of the two of them, including a couple of songs Jinyoung had never heard of. He thought they were by some indie artist Jaebeom listened to but after seeing the producing software and notebooks full of lyrics, he realised what they really were.</p>
<p>Listening to one was painful enough, Jaebeom’s deep voice reaching Jinyoung’s soul, talking about people he loved, about feelings he had, the hardships he faced. There were at least fifty songs that Jaebeom had written that Jinyoung had never known about, just one mildly familiar one which he realised was part of the score for Icarus. He had never questioned where the song came from, never realising it was part of Jaebeom’s craft.</p>
<p>After having gone through every bit of Jaebeom’s room, Jinyoung downloaded a copy of Jaebeom’s songs on his phone and grabbed just the watch box and Jaebeom’s duffle bag before stepping out of the room and locking the door behind him. He was still to go through said bag before he was just too scared to. It was the last thing that Jaebeom had on him before he left Jinyoung, the younger was just not willing to part with it.</p>
<p>He wanted Jaebeom’s parents to have something of his present, or at least recent past, other than the things they had for Jaebeom’s childhood. The watch and bag were his best bet at something symbolic enough that they didn’t resent him for keeping that part of Jaebeom away from them. The bag especially, Jinyoung remembered the smile on Jaebeom’s face when he’d received it from his dad. </p>
<p>Jaebeom had joined their school athletics team after Jinyoung had gotten selected for it, which Jinyoung realised was something he probably did for him knowing how bad running was for his condition. He unfortunately only had a tattered, old bag he carried to school for his shoes and uniform, while all the other members had owned fancy bags from big brands and they had often made fun of the boy for it. Even though he never told his father anything about the incidents, he received the bag for his birthday and it was one of Jaebeom’s favourite possessions ever since.</p>
<p>So the bag for his dad and the watch for his mom, Jinyoung thought, standing at the edge of the pathway at the edge of the road that led to their house. Before he got too far in though, curiosity took over Jinyoung and the strong urge to look inside the bag latched onto him.</p>
<p>Sitting down there, on the gravel on the pathway to Jaebeom’s parents’ house, Jinyoung zipped open the bag to find a few pairs of clothes, a small notebook and an mp3 player with a pair of headphones. Flipping over to the first page of the book, Jinyoung saw the familiar scribble of Jaebeom’s handwriting. But instead of it being a normal diary entry, it was a list of instructions, addressed directly to Jinyoung. </p>
<p>With shaking hands, Jinyoung followed what was said, and before he knew it, he was having a full mental breakdown, crying his eyes out and scratching at his own face as he read, and heard, what Jaebeom had to say to him. He couldn’t hate the elder he realised, he knew that well, but he did have hatred in his heart, towards himself. Knowing that he’s the reason Jaebeom lost so many precious moments of his life, he’s the reason the elder suffered, it was enough to make Jinyoung lose his mind entirely. He saw the watch box next to him and it tipped him over the edge, Jinyoung used his hands to dig up the mud around him and bury it in the ground, never wanting to look at it ever again.</p>
<p>The next thing Jinyoung knew, he was being shaken awake by a woman he’d never seen before. She kept calling him by his name but he didn’t know how she knew that. He looked around himself and he had no idea where he was. He just had a soft song playing in his ears, a deep voice singing about losing himself, and Jinyoung liked that voice. He wanted to listen to that song live someday. The woman kept trying to pull him out of his world but he didn’t know her. He realised he didn’t know where his own home was, who his parents were, he just knew his name and a ghost of a name that he couldn’t bring himself to say it.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Any kudos and comments are much appreciated. Follow me on <a href="https://limjaeseven.tumblr.com/%E2%80%9D">Tumblr.</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>